I am writing a series of ebook about how my stroke made me nothing, forced me to be something, and showed me how to change my fortune. I would like to share the trailer from my first ebook, ‘God Talking Out Loud’. I would love to get your feedback.
God Talking Out Loud
I was sitting in a wheelchair in the doorway of my hospital room. It could have been sunny, cloudy, or maybe even raining. I don’t remember. All I could think about was the horrible thing God had done to me!
It was the end of May, one month since my stroke. I was physically shattered and mentally crushed. Many people still couldn’t understand me, as my throat muscles for speaking were severely damaged. I could barely stand-up, much less walk. My right hand was paralyzed. I was completely unable to take care of myself.
‘Why did this happen to me,’ I thought. I was feeling like God tossed me away, and wiped me out, like a worthless penny.
“Who am I?” I spoke out loud, asking the question over and over again. I knew I was not the healthy, can-do anything, bullet-proof woman, I had pretended to be.
Like the voice that spoke to Moses out of the burning bush, I heard “you are love!” The voice was neither man nor woman. It could only be heard by me; yet it was as real as the air I was breathing.
Perhaps it was the voice of God, or something in or around me that was in touch with God. I know only that it was pushing love to bust loose in me in some way!
Recognizing that I was in a wheelchair, my frail right leg held up on a foot rest, and my paralyzed right hand lying dead on the wheelchair’s tray, my happiness center right brain took charge. With my left hand, I started turning the left wheel of my chair. At the same time, I lifted my left foot up, and began the best one-foot wheelchair-walk ever!
It was as though I bolted out the room, like a Road Runner. I wheeled myself into the hallway, turned right and went directly into the TV lounge, which was right next to my room.
I parked my wheelchair beside a young lady, barely in her thirties, sitting in a wheelchair, watching TV. Her left foot was in a brace and held up by a foot rest. Though her left arm, rested on a tray, and could move a little, it looked as lifeless as she did.
She wore a hopeless look on her face, as though she too had lost faith in God. Normally I would be scared to approach someone so distraught; but this time I was flying high on love.
Maybe she saw the compassion on my face. I don’t know. All I know is that she responded to me with a warm welcoming smile. We talked like friends, though I cannot remember about what. Nothing really mattered, except for the fact that we understood each other’s pain.
That day I went to one patient after another. Mostly, I listened with compassion to their story, and shared mine. I reminded them that they were not alone, like the voice reminded me.
Though this was great during the day, when night came, I still needed to know what God really wanted from me. What did He want from love?
A few days later, I was waking up from my sleep, when the burning bush-like voice spoke again.
“Share your story with the world!”
I felt as though I had been given a great blessing. I cried deeply, scrunching up my face, releasing no sound, like people do when they don’t want to share their moment. That day I knew my stroke was my contribution to the world, a story of Love!
My brain was injured, my right hand was paralyzed, my thoughts were confused, and my words were jumbled. I was in the perfect place for listening to Spirit, as it began to reveal the way to manifesting and sharing the love and prosperity that had always been with me, with us all.